I is for...

I had written and scheduled a post for today for the Writers of Kern Blog challenge, but something happened this morning and I just had to write about it.

 is for... Incomprehensible

“You never know how quickly a life can be taken away until you see for your own eyes…”

In 7th grade I remember playing in the gym with my friends only to look over and see a 6th grader sitting against a window alone.
He looked really familiar and then it hit me. That 6th grader looking so out of place was my uncle, Willie Cobb Jr. Born 4 days before me, he was the son of my Grandfather Willie Cobb Sr. (half black and Native American) and Dora Santana (Mexican)
I know it sounds strange but my mother’s youngest brother was my age. It was difficult growing up to see him as my uncle… but he was.
I walked over to him and sat down. I ditched my friends because he was family and he was alone. He had just transferred to my school unbeknownst to me and I wanted to make sure he was adjusting well.
He didn’t say much, but I’m a talker so eventually we began a conversation. I remember him wearing a T-shirt with the singer Selena on it. I didn’t know who she was at the time but he did. He told me she was a Mexican singer that was tragically killed. That was news to me but it led me to look her up and fall in love with her music.
Me, My uncle Willie Cobb Jr. and my sister April
After that day, we formed a bond and we tried to keep in touch. Once in a while we would lose track of each other for a while but eventually we would find each other again.

One such time was Prom. It wasn’t my prom but a male friend of mines that needed a date. To my surprise my uncle was there taking a friend of his to her prom. It was cool seeing him and getting to hang out with him for the evening.
It was a long time after that before I saw him again yet I always asked about him. He was special to me and I wanted to always know how he was doing.
Velzie and Willie (my Mom's two younger siblings)

The next time I got to see him was when my mom (his sister) passed away. He expressed to me the regret he had about staying away for so long. During the time he was away, he came out to his mom and siblings that he was gay. He was afraid how my mom and the rest of us would react to his news.
I informed him it didn’t matter.  We would always love him no matter what. I didn’t say to him that I was discovering that my own sexual orientation was anything but straight. I regret that now.
We kept in touch a little after that. We had long conversations at first but then it faded to just checking up on each other once in a while.

Willie, my sister Martha, my brother Maurice (in back) and Me.

This morning I woke up to a news  he passed away. My mouth hung opened when my sister told me.
He was only 29 and I felt his death was incomprehensible.
I didn’t understand how this amazing person was taken away from us so soon. I am hurt and my heart is so heavy.
I just don’t understand.
I stared at pictures I had of him on Facebook and something told me to go to his page.
The quote above was his status message.
It was the last status message he posted.
I’m going to miss him.


  1. Donnee,
    So sorry about the loss of your uncle. He sounded like a very special person. I'm glad you took the time to talk with him at school.
    Passing away so young is incomprehensible.

    1. He was a wonderful and sweet person. It's hard knowing that I have to continue my life knowing he is not in it.

  2. Oh, Donnee, My heart aches for him and for you and your family. Such a loss of a human being who would surely make a difference in the world.

    My thoughts and prayers are with you and family. Sending love and positive energy.


  3. My heart is breaking for you. No words will help now, but hopefully the thoughts and prayers of new friends and your family will help. I am holding you tightly in my thoughts and prayers.

  4. I'm so sorry for your lost, Donnee. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

  5. I wish I had read this sooner! I would have given you a huge hug on Saturday! I am so sorry for this loss in your life; he sounds like someone who was an amazing human being. I will bet that he left an indelible mark on everyone's life that he came into contact with. God bless you and your family.


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