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Showing posts from October, 2013

O is for...

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O is for... Ominous Moon











“Are you having fun?” Brian screamed over the boisterous voices and the loud Hip-Hop music. “Yes!” I yelled back continuing to slide my body against his. I was happy that he was into the skinny jeans fade because as I glided my body against his I could feel his erection and how much he wanted me. The lights were bright but I didn’t care. I just wanted to have fun and forget about the awful way this night started. Full moons always get me in the mood to do some wild and crazy things but I wanted to be indoors drinking, dancing and having fun. I tried online dating for the first time and after sitting for two hours waiting on a date that never showed up, I had time to think.  Who could I get to come home with me tonight?  So when the restaurant bartender offered to show me a good time, I said what the hell. I might as well start tonight.  That is how I ended up with Brian in this club dancing my troubles away.   It didn’t hurt that he was very attractive. He was tall…

N is for...

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is for Narration


“Do you realize you narrate everything you are going to do?” My 13year old pointed out one day I looked at her confused. “What are you talking about?” She laughed and sat back in her comfortable position on the couch. “Whenever you have to do something you say it out loud.” Her examples included me announcing when I am going to the restroom, announcing when I am about to turn the channel, announcing every little thing that runs through my head. She also mentioned that I always talk to myself aloud. Running ideas around so that everyone in the room can hear them. Okay, so I talk to myself. I talk to myself a lot and yes I say it out loud. Okay I say it out loud a lot. I never really started to pay attention to myself until to my daughter said something. I wonder why narrate myself all day? Am I really trying to relate to my family what my next move is going to be? I mean, let’s be honest. I always have to let them know where I’m at and what I am doing. If I go to the bathroom wi…

M is for...

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is for Madness



I am been a witness to a lot of madness in my life.  There is the usual family madness and dealing with friends that are a little crazy, but what I experienced as a Health Inspector for the Marion County Public Health Department in Indianapolis, IN exposed me to some the craziest things I had ever seen. I worked at the Health Department as an Environmental Health Specialist for 3 years before I decided to pursue my writing career full time. As an EHS, I inspected houses, hotels, apartments and some commercial properties. I had to enforce the Marion County Health Code and any violators that refused to make corrections or repairs to come into compliance with the code, I had to either file that person for court or send them a fine.

I have inspected houses of people that hoard, people that use their yards as junk yards, people that use their attic as a trash room and I have seen commercial properties that been left to fall apart by wealthy investors. I have heard stories from …

L is for...

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is for the Library


I am a library geek. I call myself that because in my lifetime I have worked or volunteered at 5 different libraries. That is about 6 years of my existence on this earth. I love libraries and I always will because they hold one of my greatest treasures inside…Books! From eighth-grade until I was 23 years old I worked in libraries either as a page, a circulation clerk, computer monitor, billing specialists or computer liaison. Many people assume that working in a library has to be boring. They assume being surrounded by books everyday has to be a massive snooze fest. But I’m here to tell you, some of my wildest craziest life experiences happened in a library. I worked as a library assistant in the eighth-grade and a boy who was also volunteering there fingered me in the back room. It was the first time that had I had a real orgasm. When I worked at the Gary public library in high school, I snuck my boyfriend at the time up to the stacks upstairs and we would make out. At th…

K is for...

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is for Kindness

My husband tells me that I have a kind heart. I’m generous and I love to help people. Throughout the year I am always remembering birthdays and sending out cards and gifts to all of my loved ones. On Christmas, whether I get anything or not, I go crazy sending all of my family something even if it means baking cookies all day to ship to friends and relatives. After listening to Dr. Chuck Wall, The originator of “Random Acts of Kindness” , I was determined to make a strangers day. I set out one Sunday determined to make someone’s day. No matter how hard  I tried I could not find anyone that I could just help. Some guy was sitting in Starbucks with nothing to drink. I offered to buy him a coffee… he refused it. I went to the grocery store and offered to buy someone’s groceries… they refused. I wonder what was going on.  Here I was with a “Tell me what you need and I will give it to you” sign on my forehead and there was no one who wanted anything from me. That was a first. I …

J is for...

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is for Judgment

I had a friend who couldn’t understand how another friend of mine could be bisexual. “Doesn’t she realize she is committing the greatest sin?” My first thought was, I was thought all sense were equal. Then I thought, Who is she to judge? She has had at least 3 abortions which mean she was also fornicating. I hate to judge people and it really irks me when others look down on people because they live their life in a different way. I filled that we as humans are all flawed and full of sin. We were made to be imperfect creatures therefore we may not make all the perfect choices in our lives. The feeling that I am being judged by a large group of people leaves me feeling uneasy and anxious. I never felt the most judged than when I was in church. The way they made me feel was not welcoming and knowing how they feel about people who are not “straight” made me avoid it at all cost. So, for a while, I stopped attending church. Church did not feel like the house of Jesus Christ like m…

I is for...

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I had written and scheduled a post for today for the Writers of Kern Blog challenge, but something happened this morning and I just had to write about it.









is for... Incomprehensible



“You never knowhow quickly a life can betaken away untilyou see foryourown eyes…”
In 7th grade I remember playing in the gym with my friends only to look over and see a 6th grader sitting against a window alone. He looked really familiar and then it hit me. That 6th grader looking so out of place was my uncle, Willie Cobb Jr. Born 4 days before me, he was the son of my Grandfather Willie Cobb Sr. (half black and Native American) and Dora Santana (Mexican) I know it sounds strange but my mother’s youngest brother was my age. It was difficult growing up to see him as my uncle… but he was. I walked over to him and sat down. I ditched my friends because he was family and he was alone. He had just transferred to my school unbeknownst to me and I wanted to make sure he was adjusting well. He didn’t say much, but I’m a …

H is for...

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is for... Healing


Healing is a hard process. Especially for someone like me. For years, I was known to hold a grudge. Since I was a kid I was a master at holding grudges. I had a friend from kindergarten whom I felt wronged me and I hated her for 7 years. Oh yes, I was the master of holding grudges. When I was 18, my cousin decided that I was not good enough to be a bridesmaid in her wedding even though we grew up together and were practically more than cousins, more like best friends and sisters. I was completely devastated by her decision and so completely betrayed. I held a grudge against her for 10 years. I held a grudge for a decade! Yes, I was a master at holding a grudge and I refused to let go of my anger and hate. I always felt like I was punishing them for the way they wronged me by avoiding them and not talking to them and dropping them from my life. In reality I was punishing myself. I didn’t get rid of the anger I just let it fester. I was suffering inside not being able to live…

G is for...

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is for... Gary, Indiana


Gary, Indiana. 
Where I was born and raised. This city through all the strife and turmoil shaped me into the woman that I am today. I grew up in city that was once called murder capital of the world. I lived a sheltered life on the worse side of the city… The east side. Back in the day, Gary used to be one of the largest cities and most prosperous cities in Indiana because of the Steel Mills.  People of all races flocked to the city for jobs and settled there, ready to raise their families. My grandparents were one of those families. They raised 5 children in Gary while my grandfather worked at the Steel Mill to support them. The city now… is nowhere near what it used to be. The people have changed, the city has changed and neither has changed for the better. The city is now a place where the people are poor and the politicians are driving around in Mercedes. When most people hear about Gary they comment about one of 3 things. They either talk about the crime or the…