I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus (part 5)

New Year’s Eve...

I wasn’t very hopeful.

I wasn’t hopeful that the New Year would bring a change in my marriage.

I had these thoughts as my husband and I made love.

It was 6am and he rolled over wanting to have sex. I was excited. Christmas Day was the last time we had sex and it was only a few days later and he wanted to do it again.

“Oh Yes!” my husband moaned.

He pounded me and was just as aggressive as he was before pulling my legs onto his shoulder hammering me. This time there wasn’t any foreplay. There was only his sudden need and my free and waiting vagina.

I was down to make love to my husband but it’s been two minutes and he was close to coming already.

“Fuck!” he groaned.

Then he came inside of me letting my legs fall to the bed. We lay that way for a few minutes before I spoke.

“Don’t you want to eat me out?” I asked rolling over to look at him.

Breathing heavily he replied.

“No. I just came inside of you. It would be like I was eating my own cum. Plus I have to get to work.”

I wasn’t shocked at his words. I knew that would be the answer but it was worth a shot to ask.  I opened my mouth to protest his decision but closed it. I knew it would be useless. He was already climbing out of bed and heading to the bathroom. I heard the shower start and I laid there listening to him shower and thinking about my conversation with him yesterday.

Once we were alone and the kids were asleep, I brought up the fact that our sex life has waned in the past 6 months and intimacy between us had diminished well before that.

“Maybe we need some counseling or something to get us back on track.”

He chuckled.

“Babe, I’m not going to therapy. Plus, I believe that we have a good sex life. I’m not sure what you’re talking about.”

I let it go that night. I could tell I wasn’t going to convince him. It only made me a little resentful.

He had to work New Year’s Eve so he left shortly after he showered. I spent the day unfocused and lost in my head. The kids were running amuck destroying the house at every turn. I didn’t care at that point. I was depressed and felt hopeless.  

I only came back to earth when the baby cried or the kids knocked over a vase and I spent time cleaning it up. Other than that I was caught in thoughts of how was I going to make my marriage work. The truth? My husband was a good man and a good father. He took good care of his mother and sister and was generous to a fault. Yet I still had thoughts of leaving him. Was sex really that important? It felt like it was when I yearn to be touched. The lack of intimacy was making me feel unloved.

I knew, however, I loved him too much to just walk away. I would do anything to make it work and get back on the right track. I owed that to the 10 years we have been married and to my children to do all that I could. Even if our sex life never recovered I was here for the long haul and deep down I always knew that.

But I knew I was going to need to find a way to get my needs met and stay with my husband.

When it was almost time for Jeremy to come home I kicked it into high gear. The kids helped me put away all of the toys. I nursed and put the baby down for his second nap of the day and started dinner. I got the boys to sit down and watch a movie while my daughter played games on my phone.

Just as I had finished cooking dinner, my daughter entered the kitchen carrying my phone.

“Mom, I made a mistake. I was playing a game and someone called you. I answered it…then hung up.”

I grabbed the phone and looked. I could see that my mother called me. I wasn’t in the mood to call her back.  I exited that screen and came across my contacts screen. I knew who I had recently added to my contacts and that thought sent a shiver down my spine. I looked up at my daughter who was waiting for the phone back and spoke to her.

“Kailen, go watch the movie with your brothers, Mommy needs to use her phone.”

My daughter under protest went to watch the movie and I raced upstairs. I closed and locked my bedroom door and sat on the bed. I thought about what I wanted to do and what I should do. I should have deleted this number already. I should try and forget about my affair or be honest with my husband about it and ask for his forgiveness.

What I wanted to do was leave my husband in the dark about my affair. I wanted to contact my secret Santa and I wanted to be fucked like he fucked me again. I rationalized that it would be just sex and nothing more. I loved my husband.

I didn’t love this other man.

That thought gave me the momentum to do what I did next. I decided that I would find Jim’s number in my contacts. I opened up my messages and composed a text to him.

Hi, Jim? It’s me Ashley. We met at the Mall Christmas Eve. Not sure if you remember me.”

I sat there staring at the message for a few minutes. Then I pressed send. After I sent it I instantly regretted it. Guilt and other emotions consumed me. I ran my hands across my face. I took a deep breath and stuck the phone in my pants pocket. I heard the baby cry and I went immediately to retrieve him. I carried him downstairs. As I got to the bottom, I realized my husband was home. He greeted the children and we all met in the kitchen for dinner.

Throughout dinner my phone was hot in my pocket. I wondered if he would contact me back or if he would even remember who I was. I may not have been the only woman he slept with that day at the mall. Maybe if he didn’t contact me it was for the best. I tried to put the message in the back of my mind.

While we ate dinner, we discussed my husband’s day and what our plans were for New Year’s Day. Then my pocket began to vibrate and a sound emitted letting me know that I received a message. I swallowed the lump in my throat unsure who sent it and hoping and not hoping it was Jim.

I pulled out my phone and looked at the messenger. The letters S.C. were on the screen.  I stuck my phone back in my pocket and continued to listen to my husband talk with my legs shaking under the table.

I didn’t check the message until after dinner when the baby was playing with my husband and the other kids were either drawing or playing Legos. I hid upstairs in the bathroom with the door closed and locked. I read the message…

How could I forget you?

His words made my heart beat faster and I contemplated how to respond. I finally decided to tell the truth.

Not sure why I’m texting you.

I waited and waited for a response from him. It seemed like forever before he replied. Finally my phone pinged and I hungrily peered at the new message.

You want what I want. Another chance to make each other come. I remember how sweet your cum was.

I was sitting on the lid of the toilet not sure how I was going to reply to his words. I knew that they turned me on and all rational thoughts ceased. I was again controlled by my libido and I needed more.

I remember how sweet your come was too. I replied.

What are you wearing? he asked.

Bra and panties, I lied.

I want to peel those off of you. I want to make you come again so I can lick it all up.

I almost climbed into the bathtub and undressed. But I realized that my family would probably interrupt me soon and I had to be careful. Hearing his words made my clit ache however and I knew that it would probably just be this way until everyone was fast asleep and I had the opportunity to touch myself. I replied to him about what I truly wanted.

I want you too.

Then come and see me, he said. You don’t have to wait until next Christmas.

Panic attacked me. I knew that I wanted so much to throw caution to the wind and just go and see him. Again, my desire for the man clouded my judgment and I actually thought about going.

I don’t even know where you live, I texted back.

2655 W. 38^th St. Apt 408, he replied

I glared at the address he sent and decided that I wanted him bad enough that I was willing to drive over and see him. That realization frightened me. Did that mean I was willing to put my marriage on the line just for a quick fuck?

I gathered myself and marched downstairs. I found my husband nodding off on the couch and the kids completely destroying the house again. Even my 10 month old was joining the destruction by dumping popcorn and eating it off the floor. I shook my husband awake.

“What?” he asked sitting and then standing.

“I need to make a trip to the store.”

“It’s pretty late babe. Do you really need to go?” he asked.

I didn’t need to go. I shouldn’t go. But I was going to do it anyway.

“It’s so hard to go shopping with five kids during the day. I can go now and you can put the kids to bed,” I replied.

“Do you need me to come with you? I can help you with the kids while you shop.”

“No!” I replied. Then I shook my head and smiled.

“No, I’ll be fine.”

He narrowed his eyes at me and then leaned over and kissed me on the cheek.

“Have fun at the store. I’ll hold it down here.”

I smiled and grabbed my coat. I headed out the door. As I drove away from my house I could feel the fear and anxiety build up inside and almost overtake me. Yet I continued on my journey following the GPS to the other side of town to a bricked Apartment building.

Apt. 408. I remembered that number as I entered the building. There was no intercom system so I just walked in and searched for an elevator. I found it and climbed inside. Before the doors closed a woman entered and hit the button for the 3^rd floor. That reminded me. I hit the button for the 4^th floor. We didn’t say anything to each other. That was fine with me. When we reached the 3^rd floor she exited. The doors closed and took me to the 4^th floor. Once the doors opened, I exited and looked at every door until I found room 408. I knocked on the door. There was no answer at first and I instantly thought how big of a mistake this was. I lied to my husband to come here and I have no clue if he even really lives here.

I raised my fist to knock again and the door flew opened. Standing there was my mall Santa in only a pair of boxers.

“I uh…uh…” I said unable to find the words I was searching for.

He smiled and pulled me inside. He slammed the door behind me.

I didn’t have to say a word before he was kissing me and pulling my clothes off my body.

“I am so shocked you actually showed up,” he said throwing my coat onto the couch and then pulling my sweater over my head and tossing it to the floor.

He wasn’t the only one shocked. I couldn’t believe what I was doing. I lied to my husband so that I could have sex with another man. This wasn’t me. I felt like a different woman.

He pulled my pants down to my ankles. Then my panties came downward as he dropped to his knees in front of me. He pushed open my legs a little. He approached my sex and before I could take a deep breath, he stuck his tongue between my pussy lips and licked. My knees buckled and he grabbed me.

“We better take this to the sofa,” he said.

He led me over and helped me sit down. He pulled off my shoes and then my pants and panties followed. He wasted no time spreading my legs and dropping his head down between them. I moaned loudly as he found my clit.

I looked down and watched. His tongue was twirling around my clit making me feel so good. I threw my head back and prayed that this pleasure would never end. I needed this more than I have ever needed anything. No one has ever made me feel so good. Not even Jeremy. 

Jeremy.

Once my mind went back to my husband, I began to drown in guilt. Cheating on my husband for the second time to end the year was not what I wanted.

“No. Stop,” I said despite my body’s desperate need for him to keep going.

He sat up and wiped my juices from his mouth with the back of his hand.

“What?” he asked.

“I need to leave,” I said moving from the couch and standing. “I have to go.”

“Now?” he asked standing too.

“Yes…my husband. I just can’t.”

He stared at me for a second. Then he folded his arms across his chest.

“I get it, but I wish you would stay,”

I sighed. I wanted to stay too but I guess I wasn’t cut out to do this. I didn’t say anything else to him as I dressed, grabbed my coat and purse and exited his apartment. I walked from the building in tears. I cried because I almost again cheated on my husband and because I wanted Jim to fuck me so bad.

I crunched through the snow in my boots. Despite my eyes being blurred from the tears, I made it to my car. I cried all the way to the grocery store.